a long breather just around the corner

That period of relaxation is just around the corner for me as I prepare to leave on holidays for China tomorrow morning.  I'm still writing this from my lunch break in between a full day of teaching today, but when I go back home and kick my shoes off, it will be the last time for this year!  I'm sad to have neglected both my blog here and on Faunfare but when I return from China and have little else to focus on except some leisurely thesis-writing, I'm planning on throwing myself head first into my business.

There is a lot of inspiration around me at the moment.  Several of my friends are crossing major life milestones, like marriage, buying their first home, and starting their own businesses.  Some tease me that I'm going through a quarter-life crisis, but I've started feeling like I'm ready to take my perfumery beyond just a hobby.  I feel like I have been selling my creations on Etsy for a while now and the curiosity and novelty factor is starting to wear off.  I don't know if I will ever find the kind of success that would allow me to run a perfumery full-time (and right now I love my day job too much to want to) but I'm not happy until I know I'm investing all of myself in whatever I have set my mind on.

Have a wonderful two weeks while I'm gone!  I'll touch base when I get back :).

just need a breather

Since my last blog post here, I feel like I haven't had even a few hours to sit still and breathe.  I'm sadly in the same frantic and worn-out state of mind that I was in when I decided to start this blog, and I feel like I need its healing properties more than ever now.  However, the next 2 days here might prove to be a nice respite.  I just completed a long and tedious load of marking yesterday so just for now until Friday when I teach a full day of class and pick up another load of assignments to mark, I can focus on the meditative bliss of my writing.

My mind is in a million pieces right now, especially about my perfume business.  I feel as though I have so many good friends for whom I usually rely on, but they seem out of my reach as I have just spent the last few months gone to ground with a gruelling work schedule.  My perfume sales in July were phenomenal and I have it to thank for new friends and a wardrobe full of new oils to play with, but August through September, I saw a whole lot of tumbleweeds.  When I'm desperate for answers, I begin to wonder if maybe I have incurred the wrath of the Gods by arrogantly naming my perfumes after their namesake?  I have a much too vivid imagination for my own good sometimes, but please comment below if you know of a reliable cattle ranch where I may obtain a handsome bovine to sacrifice to the Gods and regain their favour.

a full plate with a side of stress

Leaving aside all the things I love about the job, what I dislike the most about it is how unbalanced the workload is. I only work over the 13 weeks of semester twice a year, and although the one month-ish break in winter is a nice time frame to recharge the batteries, I get almost four months to grow idle and apathetic over the summer before the university year begins again. There is nothing in moderation. I’m either twiddling my thumbs and flirting with notions of writing a novel or redecorating my house or I’m either working around the clock with seemingly endless hours of making lesson plans, marking, classes, answering students emails, trying to manage emotional students who are irate about their marks or the course, and the list goes on. I find I have to learn to compartmentalise my life and adjust to the fact that I might have to abandon my personal life for a few months or be deprived of intellectual challenges in the others.

This semester in particular has been draining. I have two friends getting married in 3 weeks (both on the same weekend), and this is when the bachelor/bachelorette parties have been abound. I had a particularly fun night out a couple of weekends ago, but I’m honestly heartbreakingly, soul-crushingly disappointed that I have to miss out on another next fortnight due to work. I’m particularly close to this couple and they have been such great friends to The Cat and I. They’re very cool so they’re not splitting up into ‘all-boys’ and ‘all-girls’ groups, but rather, they’re having a joint weekend away in the Hunter Valley. Knowing that I would have so many events on this half of the year, back in May, I signed on to tutor 7 hours a week and assist three weekends of an intensive course so that I would give me plenty of moolah to spend on gifts and festivities. It just feels especially painful that the reason why I’m able to afford such festivities this year means I can’t go.
The Cat however, offered a few “awws” but signed on to spend 3 days in the Hunter Valley anyway. I didn’t realise it was having an effect on me until a few weeks later and it dawned on me that I was working so hard to pay for both of us, but if I have to stay in Sydney, then not only does my feline other half get to party hard, but I also have to make my own way to and from work, cook, and clean up after The Cat Who Stayed, Salmon. Needless to say, The Cat didn’t know what hit him.

And isn’t it funny that when you’re stressed, the smallest things can become life or death? Perhaps things you never would have even given a second thought to before, become laden with ulterior motives and meanings. Small ignorant or insensitive remarks sound like racism, condescension, manipulation, inauthenticity, or one-upmanship. I’ve gotten annoyed at things that I just know I’ll laugh at in a few weeks time. Several times a day, when I’m buckling under the weight, I want to throw my hands up and say, “I’ve had enough!” but you push on and it gets a little bit better.

I have avoided my blog for a while because I would have rather written this in a couple of week’s time where I am laughing about it and can frame this more like, “Oh I was so stressed before, but now everything’s peachy!” but I think every now and then, it’s not so bad to reveal a little humanity and just be honest that things really suck right now.

at last, my website has come along

The last few months of humming, hawing and mindlessly tedious coding is over!

Here is the official website and store front for Faunfare, including (in my humble opinion) a delectable design, a funky shopping cart system, and a new blog in which I will be posting more about the business side of my creative life (probably). If the thought of me talking about perfumes doesn't totally turn you off, it would mean the world to me if you take a couple of minutes of your time and help me set a good precedence by saying hi at my first blog post there, and letting me know what sorts of things you would like to read there.

I have been reading some gorgeous perfume blogs lately (Providence Perfumes, Perfume by Nature, Smelly Blog, Perfume Posse, Oh, True Apothecary!) and personally, I love how each and every one of those blogs are open, candid and authentic. But before I run off and begin breaking down my pricing or confessing how I cringe every time I hear the words "artisan perfumer", can you please let this ultimately insecure, fragile little soul know whether or not topics like that will more likely turn you off?

I have found online perfume stores before that had me pulling out my credit card until I find their blog and after drowning in their miserable diatribes about how they just can't catch a break, I'm more in the mood for a glass of whiskey and break up songs pumped at full volume from my iPod, than perfume shopping. Where to draw the line between personal and professional?

organising the perfume studio

Last weekend, I finally called an end to the nightmarish excuse I had for a perfumery workspace and took the time to properly set up my studio. I used to keep my essential oils in a dark box in my wardrobe which was taken out whenever I wanted to blend. However, my collection has grown significantly and the burgeoning box soon made it impractical to pack, unpack and transport around the house every time inspiration struck. Since I began reformulating my new line of perfumes, I have been finding myself among my bottles and essences almost every hour I was not at the computer maintaining some semblance of a day job. Unfortunately, my collection gradually spread over the last few weeks and parasitically took over my dining table.

This is the dreadfully messy condition under which I have been working for the last few weeks:

It's like the aftermath of an explosion of perfumery, with bottles, pipettes, and blotter strips everywhere. One of the most confusing things was that I had trial blends placed among completed and rejected blends. I always had to remain cognisant of which were which, until I had about 20 bottles divided over 6 fragrances and it started getting out of hand.

I spent Saturday afternoon organising my collection and assembling the new area that would become my atelier. I chose to use my parlour, which has a nice armoire on which I could assemble my perfume organ--my entire collection of essences--all within easy reach, and moved an underused hall table beside it for my blending and notetaking.

Here is my organ with all my individually diluted and decanted collection of essences:

And this is the corner of my blending desk showing trial blends and some mini blotter strips for testing them:

I have made quite a lot of headway since my last blog update. Thank you to everyone who has helped me clear out my remaining collection of my previous line of perfumes. I can hardly believe it but there are now only a small handful of bottles left on the shelf and only two items left in my Etsy store. It is such a thrilling and encouraging feeling to see the slate being wiped clean, ready to begin a new and exciting chapter in my perfumery.

Since completing my first two blends, I have further brewed a sweet woodsy floral based around the incredibly alluring night-flowering jasmine, but composed it with an unexpected smoky top of juniper berry and black pepper and a deeply luxurious base of sandalwood and myrrh. I chose this interpretation so that I may offer something distinctive from a conventional, 'clinically chic' jasmine perfume you might find at a department store.

I'm also presently finalising two blends, a sweet woody perfume that is a rather masculine incarnation of roses and incense, and a fresh citrus fragrance built around a tart and complicated neroli. These two will be reformulations of my existing scents, Golden Lyre and Huntress, and will provide two lovely scents for the warmer months.

I have also been working on an official website for Faunfare, and it's almost complete. Just a few more tweaks and a couple of pages of content and it will become a convenient location for shopping and perfumery-specific news.  I appreciate that not everyone who reads About A Bun is interested in my perfumery, so I will be maintaining a more professional blog there with information about blends I'm working on, while keeping this medium for more heart-to-hearts.

update on my respite

The last two weeks away from Etsy has been godsend. Although my work and social lives have become very demanding, with Semester 2 starting with a vengeance and a friend returning to Sydney for two weeks after teaching in Japan for a year, I have immersed myself in my perfumery and have already composed two blends of which I’m far more contented than anything I have made prior. They are complex fragrances made with the most luxurious and high-quality essences I could find.

The first is composed of refreshing and uplifting citrus top notes that meld into a deep and luscious bouquet of florals that lie on an earthy green bed of moss and fern. It's vivacious, exuberant, and singular. The second is a narcotic blend of mandarin and spices on a smoky and sultry amber base, redolent of incense and silk. It's sensual, intoxicating, and intense. I have already tested them on two volunteers who rated them very positively.

I hope to make one more blend before I showcase the debut trio. Does anyone have any suggestions on what that third could smell like? I’m tossing up between a light woodsy floral of immortelle and neroli (similar to Nyctanthous), a deep floral of vanilla and rose (similar to Chypre), and a dry, woody, masculine scent akin to White Poplar.

I’d also like to mention that I will be discontinuing all my existing perfumes.  These are what remains in stock:

CHYPRE (sold out)
An impassioned brew of hungry vanilla, mysterious oakmoss, and lusty rose damask. Tenderly romantic and mercilessly erotic. The ultimate aphrodisiac no faun could live without. Notes of ylang ylang, vanilla, oakmoss, and rose damask.

GASLIGHT (sold out)
A still night at the end of a cobblestone alley. The faint scent of a woman’s perfume, sparkling wine and ill judgement still clings to the air, beckoning Jack towards his next prey. Notes of sandalwood, frankincense, cinnamon, violet, jasmine, bergamot, and bergamot.

GOLDEN LYRE (sold out)
A melodious, Apollonian blend of the sweetest fruits that dances on the skin. Energising mandarin is filled with joie de vivre. It gracefully fades into a more floral scent after a couple hours of wear. Notes of cedarwood, rosewood, clove, petitgrain, mandarin and bergamot.

HOOF & HORN (1 bottle left)
Inspired by the carousing faun herself who is fire and laughter to the bone, this is a rich and creamy blend of luscious blood oranges served with lashings of vanilla. Sweet, warm and utterly delectable. Notes of vanilla, blood orange, and pink grapefruit.

HUNTRESS (sold out)
A strong-willed scent that is both self-possessed and wild-at-heart. Bergamot sharpens the senses for your stalk through the groves at dusk. The citrusy fragrances meld tenderly with heart notes of feminine rosewood. Notes of bergamot, sweet orange, tangerine, rosewood, and patchouli.

JACK THE RIPPER (sold out)
A Victorian gentleman with a calm and composed façade, faintly scented with powdered violet and jasmine, barely restraining an alter ego of pure, concentrated sexuality frothing with vice and debauchery. Drowned down with a tall crystal glass, swirling with iced absinthe. Notes of sandalwood, frankincense, amber, cinnamon, violet, jasmine, and aniseed star.

MANDRAGORA (2 bottles left)
Bitingly venomous amber smoulders in this cruel blend of poisonous root and bittersweet sin. Notes of amber (from a plant-based accord), patchouli, root, bark and soil.

MIDSUMMER (1 bottle left)
Ripe, juicy lemons sweetened with a hint of lime on a bed of dark oakmoss. Notes of lemon, lime, wisteria, and oakmoss.

MIDWINTER (7 bottles left)
A chilly winter surrounded by the woody scent of white pine while a ghostly whisper of dried wisteria blossoms is carried on the cold winds. Notes of cypress, pine, wisteria, rosewood, and violet.

NAIAD (sold out)
Smoky white sage and lavender drowned in a clear, running stream. Herbal heart notes are gentle and elusive on first touch, like reeds on the riverbanks, but plunges you into its shadowy depths of violet and ylang ylang. Notes of sage, lavender, ylang ylang, rosewood and violet.

NYCTANTHOUS (sold out)
Delicate jasmine blossoms haunt this melancholy scent. When the sweet buds wither, grounding violet leaf leaves you to drift into a reverie on soft, shady grass. For those who flower at night. Notes of violet leaf, grass, violet, jasmine, and dew.

SATYRION (sold out)
Named after an infamous Greek aphrodisiac, this concoction is inspired by the untamed satyr who is beast and music down to the soul. Dark and warm like sugared figs washed down with a chalice full of mulled wine. Notes of cedarwood, clove, figs, mandarin, and oakmoss.

WHITE POPLAR (sold out)
An homage to the Greek God of the Dead. Rich, earthy and spicy, with a hint of bitterness. The scent begins fresh and grassy, but like a descent into the Underworld, transforms into a cold, dark and earthy scent after a couple of hours of wear. Notes of cedarwood, cypress, peppermint, and petitgrain.

first visit to a craft market

As many of you already know, my last trip to the Eveleigh Farmers' Market got me thinking about applying as a vendor for their monthly crafts one.  This Sunday, I visited their August Artisans' Art and Craft Market to scope out the vibe.

The Cat and I arrived at Carriageworks bright and early (perhaps a little too early).  We arrived at 10:15am and most of them were still setting up.  By the time we left at about 11-11:30am, it started picking up a bit more.  We were immediately struck by the wonderful range of handmade goods, everything including jewellery, upcycled notebooks, felted scarves, artworks, and ceramics.  There were no import goods or second hand in the mix, which I hear is what a lot of 'handmade' markets are doing nowadays when application numbers are low.  It was particularly promising for me to see that fragrance-wise, the closest was one stall that sold reed diffusers and candles.

Despite how new the Eveleigh Market is, the standard was very professional.  I visited every stall and almost all of them were well-established and had their own websites and many even a physical store or studio.  The prices were definitely higher than what you would find on Etsy, but knowing how much time goes into everything, I wouldn't say anything was exorbitant.  Most vendors who had $75+ necklaces or something would always be sure to also carry $10 rings or $15 earrings for impulse purchases.

In terms of selling there in the future, I had a really enlightening talk with one of the organisers on our way out.  He was quite frank and said that with what I make, I'm in with a good chance because they're really interested in variety.  He confirmed that jewellery is one of their most saturated categories and the applications he went through for them were two huge folders full and they had the longest waiting list.

However, measuring myself up against the other vendors there, I think I wouldn't feel comfortable applying until I was closer to their level of professionalism.  I have made two more supplies order over the weekend and today, getting much more proactive about my perfumery study and research than I have ever attempted before.  I'm thrilled to say I have quite a few exciting projects in store and I can't wait to share them with you all in due course.

where to for faunfare from here

Something quite fantastic and unexpected has happened with Faunfare in the last month; I broke even. I made back in sales everything I have spent on bottles, business cards, envelopes and postage, and essences since my very first supplies order, including those most precious that have not even made their way into my blends yet. I don’t know how it happened, but I’m immensely grateful to the amazing customers who believed in me, my perfumes, and my vision, and satiated their curiosities with a try. The feedback that I have received has also been phenomenal and more complimentary and generous than I believe I deserve.

As thankful as I am for my journey so far, I think it’s necessary for me to take a small break from selling and spend some time alone with my oils, reminding myself why I got into perfumery in the first place. To inspire myself, I ordered a copy of Mandy Aftel’s Essence & Alchemy before I left for Amsterdam, and have been devouring it since I got back. Her book is a poetic concoction of psychology, literature, and history, which weaves a tale about how natural perfumery has evolved through the ages, suitable for both aspiring perfumers and perfume-lovers. Trish of Scent Hive also had the good fortune of meeting and interviewing Mandy Aftel at her studio and presented a brilliant blog post about her experience.

Frankly, I find it mind-blowing to think what I could aspire to with my perfumery. There is still so much more I have to learn about the world of essences and I’ve never been hungrier for the knowledge.

Two nights ago, I received an email from a well-meaning browser who nevertheless startled me with her logic. She said she doesn’t like the use of cheap, synthetic fragrance oils in perfumes and wondered if I use any of it in my blends, “because the prices are so low?” Although the word “natural” features in my shop title and product descriptions, including further details of why I choose essential oils instead of synthetic ones, I can really relate to this woman’s query because a quick search of “natural perfume” on Etsy yielded for me pages and pages of products that were neither natural… nor perfumes at many times. I found numerous stores that described their perfumes as “natural” or “botanical”, but their ingredients clearly indicated the sole use of fragrance oils. I wonder if it’s that they’ve simply picked up the trend on Etsy of calling them “natural perfume oils” without realising what it means? Indeed, I have found a lot of new people who love the fact I use natural ingredients, but if I ask, they often can’t really tell me why they think natural oils are better. I have met very, very few people who can tell the difference. More personally, her point about my low prices inferring low quality hit the nail on the head of something else you know has been on my mind—pricing.

I posted a couple of weeks ago about my philosophy on pricing and how I passionately believe in selling my perfumes at below retail price. A wonderful myth that circulates Etsy is of a seller who makes high-end designer underpants. She made modest sales until one day she decided to counterintuitively increase her prices, fitting them better into the more affluent target market whose tastes and needs she caters to and her panties flew off the shelves. I wish this was indeed the case for everyone but I soberly reminded myself that perhaps for the vast majority of us mere mortal sellers, people might just simply not want our stuff and increasing the prices will only make them not want them more. This woman’s question however, brought this panty myth back into focus and made me wonder if there were more people who were turned off my store because my prices spoke louder than my words. I just wish there was a way for me to balance my love for purveying affordable perfumes without doing my work a disservice.

This finally brings me to the title of my blog entry. Where to from here?

I’m going to a take a short sabbatical, perhaps a month or two, to read and study more about perfumery theory and technique. From my own pocket, I will fund an augmented collection of rare and precious essential oils and gradually move away from some of the more affordable oils in my initial orders. I want to reconceptualise my entire brand and line, further developing my perfumes inspired by the Ancient Greek pantheon, which has been far better received than I could dream. I want to improve each and every one of my scents, replacing the lower grade oils (e.g. vanilla infusions, ylang ylang first) with the highest ones (e.g. Madagascan vanilla absolute, ylang ylang complete), and create new products such as perfume solids in lockets and pillboxes. I also want to indulge other passions of mine, writing and photography, and produce some essays and articles about why I choose to make natural perfumes instead of full or semi-synthetic blends, and spend weeks photographing my products to get them just the way I want them.

However, I know that if I progress down this path, my perfumes will no longer be viable to be sold at $6-7 a bottle. I’d imagine my ingredients alone will exceed this price, even in 5ml bottles. As such, I’m not sure there will be a place for me on Etsy, and I may have to consider other avenues, if selling is a priority. I have lots to think about in the next few months!

amsterdam summary

I returned back to Sydney after my conference trip to Amsterdam last Monday evening, however, I’m still attempting to adjust to a normal sleeping pattern as I’ve been unhealthily swinging from sleeping 14 hours one night and then 3 the next.

I presented my paper last Thursday morning to some very complimentary feedback and excellent advice. I didn’t really enjoy the conference as much as a similar one I attended in Auckland last year, and I was quite disappointed as I had consciously intended from the outset to diligently attend every session, get out of my shell and meet and greet as many people as I could, and contribute with questions and feedback for presenters whenever I was able. Although I did fulfil my promise to attend every session, some of the presenters may as well have been speaking in Latin because they were so far beyond my areas of knowledge and interest. The mood of the conference was also soured from the first morning’s plenary speaker, who was attacked by a snarky, passive aggressive academic whom I can only assume felt it was appropriate to talk to others so disrespectfully due to his own prestige. His behaviour throughout the times I had the misfortune of seeing him treat fellow academics with less experience than himself not something I would wish to emulate.

Despite my incompatibility with the conference itself, I managed to meet some really exceptional people while there. A couple of my colleagues were either from or had worked in Amsterdam and knew the city well, so we were very spoilt when they offered to show us around some of the sights, including the central city as well as the infamous Red Light District.

I have to admit my time in Amsterdam was little short of magical. The picturesque scenery around my hotel, the NH Musica, was breathtaking. My week was of ducks bathing in the canals and looking for food among the lily pads, waking up to the sound of birds singing outside my window, and the glorious golden sunsets at 10:30pm. The funding debacle at my university, which threatened to leave this business trip $1000 out of pocket for me did turn into a blessing in disguise. I was much more adventurous, and thus found it far more exciting to take a train from Schiphol airport for €2.50 rather than hail a taxi for €40. Some of colleagues who were lecturers at the university and thus eligible for staff funding for their entire trips plus expenses even went so far as to take a taxi into the conference venue every morning (a point laughed at heartily by the locals) rather than take a fraction of the time and cost to catch a tram.

I will gladly eat Dutch food for the rest of my life. At first, I was perplexed by the jugs of milk provided with every meal and the ‘salads’ which looked to me more like giant plates of dip, but everything I tried was delicious. Fresh multigrain rolls filled with soft cheese and raw mince meat was unexpected but fantastic, herring, and homemade chips (fries) topped with mayonnaise. I’m salivating just thinking about it again!
On Friday evening when the conference came to an end, I met up with two friends who took a train in from Germany. We were able to try some restaurants of our own choosing as well as visited The Rembrandt House, the artist’s actual place of residence, which has been restored and converted into a museum.

As I mentioned in my last post, I have recorded some short videologs during my journey. I was quite good about updating it on my first couple of days, but interest died out when I found myself out and about for the entire day (and night) once I met up with my friends, and the only time I had to myself was devoted to sleep. The few files that I recorded have only just recently been transferred from my iPhone to my computer, and I’m in the process of learning how to convert and edit them before they will be uploaded.

boring trip details to amsterdam

I began this journey log as I chillaxed in my seat listening to Katie Noonan & the Captains from the entertainment system. It's unfathomable to me that there's only an hour and a half to landing, this has been by far the most comfortable flight I have ever been on. I passed the time by watching the great choices of videos, including at last being able to see Tim Burton's Alice.
I was a little more apprehensive about the next 14hr leg of the journey to Amsterdam. Armed with some good advice, I found a spa where I was able to pay a small fee to use the shower. For 10 Singaporean dollars, you're provided access to a private bathroom with one of those rain shower heads and a small lounge area with hairdryers and snacks. It was the best way to spend two hours in transit at midnight.
When I got on the plane to Amsterdam, I discovered to my immense joy the plane was only about a third full. I had the entire row beside the window to myself and quickly learnt from my neighbors that the best way to enjoy it was to put the armrests up and lie down across the whole row like a bed! I even built myself a fairly cosy nest from the two extra blankets and pillows I had.
I felt so spoiled when I woke up at 2am (it was 10am Aussie time so that can't be helped) and bundled myself up in all the blankets while nostalgically watching Blue's Clues and Hey Arnold! on my entertainment system.
It was really coincidental but I bumped into a colleague who is sharing my flights to and from Singapore for a conference in Vienna on at the same time and when I sadly had to say goodbye to her and got on the plane to Amsterdam, another colleague who is attending the same conference as I waved me down as she caught me strolling through the aisle!
I'm going to pick up a sim card with Internet access when I touch down in about an hour and I'll be uploading this entry. As promised, I have been collecting small video clips when I could to try editing and publishing when I get back to Sydney but I didn't get too many opportunities to talk because I was often pressed for time or surrounded by tired people I didn't want to disturb. I promise to be more adventurous in Amsterdam!