another semester begins

This week marked the start of Semester 1 2010 at the university where I study and work.  It is a little daunting for me this semester because even though my research has intensified significantly in the last couple of months, I have agreed to take on 8 hours a week of tutoring as well.  Not wanting to travel onto campus too often, I have placed all my classes between 9am-6pm on Tuesday.

Although I have many financial reasons for wanting to take on more work this semester (e.g. cover the excesses of my conference in Amsterdam, support The Cat for his career changes, and buy a new computer), my main motivation is psychological.  I relish the opportunity just to get out of the house, the relaxing bus trip into the city where I get to catch up on my favourite podcasts (The Wigglian Way, A Pagan Heart in Maine, SpiritsCast and Elemental Castings), and having new characters and challenges on my mind.  Working from home can be so lonely.  Last semester, I grew destructively hypersensitive.  This year, as the pressure to complete my thesis mounts, I’m keeping ahead of the waves and doing my utmost to ensure I remain psychologically, emotionally and spiritually balanced.

On Tuesday, I attended a team meeting for one of my courses where I got to meet the other tutors.  Two of them were from Germany and as I chatted to them about their decisions to relocate here, I began thinking about my friend who is in the reversed position of studying in Germany.  I really missed our regular tea and sympathy sessions.  I still feel an eerie sense of emptiness whenever I walk past her Faculty’s building.  One conversation I remember having with her in particular only about a year ago was about having children.  I told her that if I decided to have children, I would like to have my first child before my 30^th birthday, but after my 25^th.  When I said this at the time, 25 felt like such a long way away, but then it occurred to me today that I turn 25 in less than 8 months.

For the first time in my life, I feel ready to have children.  However, this hopeful anticipation also comes with a sense of urgency about my career.  Perhaps another reason I’m so motivated to take on extra tutoring this semester is that I’m eager to lay down the financial foundations of my life.  I want to ensure that when I do begin hearing the soft pitter-patter of small paws, we can afford a bigger burrow with enough space for planting carrots and a cupboard full of colour pencils and craft supplies for inquisitive young minds.